STRAWBERRY! (:

self-obsessed, i just love myself. pardon me

i was set free wondering & mingling. my friends came out with weird2 plans in order to make me make friends with outsiders. but eventually, that didnt work. cause i choose not to. im done with "getting-to-know" people. my facebook account is all the ppl i noe. but i do have 2nd thoughts. i sure there's somewhere, somehow someone's waiting for me. insyaallah, the guy is a good guy, deep inside. looks can be deceiving. cause, my ex was the person who i thought he was, i wouldnt be left dangling. VERY DECEIVING. how you manage to open up my heart, your amazing. so amazing to get me fooled by your sweet werds. NOW THEN I REMEMBER, the last tyme i met you, was the time which you look at me as i was eating, looking so amazed, knowing that that was the last time you would see me, eat, smiled, talk. sooo unexpecting that you would be so heartless to leave that way. seriously, honestly, my luck gets better the moment i realized that youre not part of me. i got my job, pass my test, whatelse could i ask for? im moving on. TOODLES~~

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

10:54 AM

a pretty normal friday, basically i stay at home with my lil siblings. tortured my fat brother to exercise. heheh. i cooked vege soup for myself & butter prawns again. kononnye nak diet. BUTTER bertempek2. whether im thin or fat, theres styll someone by my side. ouhhh. seriousli, i cant wait for the approval from school. if its unsuccessful , i shall take my olevels as a private candidate. NO way im going back to secondary school. i regret not studying for Nlevels. well, im hoping to atleast have a higher nitec & wish to proceed to poly. INSYAALLAH. Fariz have been supportive of future plans. especially about my studies. But, im not gonna be a nurse. i could find you one okie? Saket hati. *roll eyes* im just a manicurist kan. well, i miss work. its been already a month plus i've been at home. had my holiday, spending time with my friends, my family. i hardly have anything to do other than chores. BORING. i would exercise if i feel like it. i miss charissa darn much. i need a pedicure, manicure, my hair done. well, i need a job. shall go job haunting with yinie soon.

ouhouh, i have to wake up as early as 6, to send my brother to tuition && have a wedding to attend. shall head to bed now. night lovelies.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

11:49 PM

its been awhile my friends, you guys are back on your foot again

could you recall, when was the last time we went out together & spend our late nights together? didnt you guys realized that our friendship gets stronger each day. this friendship was pretty unexpected. for whatever fights, disagreements & misunderstanding we had, makes us understand & bond even more. i believe some people

are jealous. cause he was the one who brought us together. without hym i wouldnt know all of you. well, i believe i WAS a stuck up girl when you guys met me, the impression you guys had towards me, the ego i had in me. heh. to think back thru, if i were both of you i would leave. but without me knowing, you guys were there &&&& saw me change. from a very egoist person, i've learnt to give & take. from the very impatient person, i became very patient. i learnt to listen more den to complain. cause i know, i wasnt the only one who has problems. im going to be 20 soon. 2011 isnt that bad.

im crazily tired. after training my cute,adorable brother to loose weight. heh.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

6:47 PM

im missing you too much till you

appear in my dreams every single night

without fail, you've been entering my dreams. i felt the warmth as if you were hugging me.

i really felt the sharp pain & cried when i woke up realized it was a nightmare.

i teared when some random girl dedicate to you a song. feel that i've lost. i've lost my path to your heart.

BUT, i've realized that your not the person i thought you was, especially when you told me about your past. you've proven so much love, care, concern, honestly & not forgetting your loyalty. i know if you would have the time, you would make all the time in the world for me.

i know i haven been sweet. i realized that it wasnt fair for you. just because i was treated like shit by other guys who was in my past. i didnt remind you that you mean alot to me like i did as before. i had sooo many negative thoughts. i had too high expectations on you. too many rules & regulation. i wasnt being myself.

IM MISSING YOU, fariz putra.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

3:09 AM

Congratulations kak yaya, upon your engagement

the clock ticks faster & faster each day. everyone is already preparing for their engagement, && some even preparing for marriage. & most are already taken. i wonder when is my turn? am i eve ready for all this hassle? do i even have savings? ouh my goodness. thinking of which, i would have to start saving for my future. heh. im thinking too far m i? *giggles*

new year was not as great as i thought it would be. i almost died, going down the bike when the traffic light was red, running in the middle of the road as my handphone slipped down my smooth hands. &&&& its a big lesson to learn. NVR EVER SMS WHILE YOUR ON THE BIKE. thank god, the road was clear & theres nobody around. PHEWWWW. what a risk.

WELL, happy new year

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

2:13 AM

i didnt realized that i styll have stalkers who wish to pick a fight with me

SOME girls are just so annoying. look bitch, when i decide YOU to be out of my life i will come back or accept you back as a friend or wadever. cause what i know, i got nothing to do with you anymore. although most of your friends are connected to me, dat doesnt mean you are my friend. & YOU CAN ASK ALL YOUR FAMILY MEMBERS TO ADD ME ON FACEBOOK. well, i fucking decide who i want to accept, reject or pend. cause 1st thing, my life really doesnt concerns you. & the best thing is, if you want to dig histories from here. jolly well do. what i noe is all these years, i nvr blogged about you. till today. your really getting on my nerves. stop bugging & just let go. you should fucking noe who you are.

&&& just a simple reminder, im already moved on many donkey of years. hah, tkmu nak perasan ok pmpn?

OUHOUH, its saturday, & im at home. &&& its been almost two weeks, i've been doing my house chores. &&& im sooo happy to be home. although i almost died the ferst day of doing them as i was nearly electricuited. =___= heh. but, i enjoy doing them especially when nobody's at home. karoake on my own. the living room is everyday neat & tidy. & not fergeting the kitchen too. well, my nails almost broke while doing the chores. now im trying to wake as early as 6 to my chores have my breakfast. afternoon nap lunch. & off doing whatever i want. ouhhh PAMPERED CHILD, finally. ouhouh, i had hotcake with sausage this morning. && the delivery took almost two hours. without me realizing it was raining. as i was too bz with my strawberry & horlicks. & can i have a ginue pig please??? or a BUNNEH like the one my cuzin have. speaking of which, will be heading to kl super soon. cant wait! well, i've been waiting^^v

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

4:16 PM

F*** FINALLY, met babygerl after a month not meeting

due to work & the fact that i have a boyfriend i cant spend my sundays with her. ALTHOUGH i meet hym alternate sundays. well bay, i freaking happy to make my way to meet you after a tiring day. eventually SHE DIDNT GO TO SKUL! & she lied=___= so tk perlu b! tahu pun i banyak membebel! heh. well, we did catch up on alot of things! a freaking long conversation till dawn. heh. OUH YA, YOU MADE ME SIT ON THE BUS FOR MORE THAN AN HOUR! PLEASE, dun do that again. rapunzel next b! bikini outing next year perhap? JUS YOU & ME. burn some fats first^^ we got few months till your leg is perfectly healed. im happy, im happy dat i've met you & meimei & the best thing is, you guys can talk to my boyfriend. eventhough it started so FORMALLY. the day ends with a awesome ride.

&& todaymakes our 1month together♥

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

2:54 PM

a beautiful tuesday, i love the whether. i love sitting at home doing nothing. well, im having my holidays. having an awesome time with my family at home & friends outside. watching movies on weekdaes, hanging out quite late with boyfriend. BUT NOT LATE NIGHTS. when out with ray yesterday & caught a hillarious movie, due date. my dear ray enjoyed the show like crazy as he rated 4/5 as for my the movie was so annoying & the cinema was so cramp! my leg was too long && the cina man beside me was enjoying. my goodness! but overall, i enjoyed myself to accompany ray. sweet luh kan dapat kawan cam aku?! your turn will come soon! accompany me, ITS A FREAKING MUST! okie ray?
well, lately my babyboyfriend have been bz. bz with hys work, studies, family & friends. so im alwaes looking forward for weekends. its the only time that he would spare tyime for me. well boyfriend, NO ONE ELSE is in my heart other than you. even if your so far away from me doing your stuffs, i could feel you so close to me & not neglecting me even if you didnt have tyme for me. thank you for your AWESOMELY COOL WATCH. although its not pink, im loving it. just as long as i got my freaking pink helmet^^v

BOY, if god brought us together again & wanted us to be with eachother. i would just follow his path to be with you.

&&& im styll thinking whether to cotinue my studies or just work. daddy say, you try applying. since you qualified already. khairul, dats why i need your advice! I CANT WAIT TO SEE YOU TMR so much to tell you^^ &&& babygirl, i oso cant wait to see you. i can spend the whole day talking nonstop! heh. SUMPAH IM REALLY LOOKING FORWERD FOR TMR. meeting my babybrother for breakfast, head to meet khairul den babygerl LASTLY, boyfriend fetching me home. its a bz holiday

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

2:07 AM

The Meaning Of True Friendship.

do real friends tell others that "ouhhh so far she's the one who alwaes messages me so i just reply her" does that really matter who messages who first. i was sincere being friends with you & wanting to catch things up as i treasured every moment with you. the fact is i do miss you. but i know its not worth it. at least i do have friends who could guide me thru. 8years of friendship & styll going strong. FINALLY, we manage to have time to catch up with life. &&& heard so many shocking stories. well, upon hearing about engagements & wedding which is going to be held this year. CONGRATUALTAIONS. who says its wrong to get married in your late teens. ouhhh so exciting. when is my turn? HEHS. nono. i still thinking to further my studies.

As lonely i could get, i believe i have friends around me.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

10:20 PM

taxi driver; are you philipino? which part of philipines is that?

me; sorry. im singaporean uncle. im malay.

taxi driver; ouhh lord im so sorry. frankly speaking, you really dun look like malay. you looked mixed

me; ouhh. no worries, i got dat alot of tymes.

taxi driver; youre such a nice & beautiful girl. so your studying or working?

me; thank you. ouhhh im working right now.

taxi driver; ouh goodness, you look so young. your 19?

me; wah. uncle, not bad. you noe im 19. many thought im in my early 20's

taxi driver; whats your highest education? o'levels? how come your not studying

me; nitec, planing to continue skuling.

taxi driver; you must be a notty girl. education now is important. && may i noe wad are you working as?

me; yes uncle, i noe. its not easy living in singapore. im working as a manicurist.

taxi driver; you noty girl, you gave your parents alot of trouble ryte. manicurisT? notty girl, you should be flying. i bet your more den 158

me; ouh yes. my younger days. goodness. i regretted. flying?

taxi driver; yes flying, you should be up there travel. you really got good features.

me; ouhhh. thats every girls dream. might be considering

taxi driver; dun need to consider, i see that you can respond well. you should.

me; after i finish my diploma, see where it takes me to. not easy you see.

taxi driver; i believe you could. make sure in years time i would see you again in the plane.

me; hopefully i could. uncle, you forget to switch on your meterfare.

taxi driver; ouh dear. i was too bz fighting with the other cab. till i forgot. no worries. that will be $6

me; hehe. ouh thank you uncle. shall see you again.

a conversation i had with a taxi driver which was on deepavali. & i realized he oso forget to charge me for extra fee. ouhouhh. im so bored at home. other than going to the doctor, i didnt step out of the house. && i received a stack of medicine for my head. its been awhile i didnt go to polyclinic. goodness. well, i have to save for my rainy days. boyfriend was bz with hys grandpa as he is heading to HAJI. well, i didnt have a chance to meet hys grandpa befer he left. i was invited to hys house for kenduri. as hys parents wanted me to be close to them. well, the last tyme i met them was, a week ago. we had dinner together & yet i embarrassed myself. shall not reveal it here. ahhhhhh. i miss everyone. boyfriend, girlfriends & especially my bestest boy-friend & my babygirl. if only i got my own transport to travel to the west, i would go there twice aweek or three times. hais. MAC DONALDS, im craving for cinnamon melts please

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

10:23 PM

when was the last time i spend time with my family? other than raya? i remember it was when i had my extensions. how long can that be? almost to a year. it seems that i've been too bz with work. &&& my mum hardly have her offs on sundays. almost every sunday i manage to spend my time with friends. & some stuffs. FINALLY, on the 7th november which was on last saturday. i booked that particular day for my mum. i didnt expect the lil ones would come along, well. i did had fun. strolling thru johor bahru. being stared by many as if i was an alien. shopping for my makeup stuffs. YEAH, i only bought that & a pink slipper thanks to the cute chinese malaysian gut who help me chose. ^^ i spend almost 20mins to choose a slipper. very satisfied though. after shopping we headed to TAMPOI & made our way to the entertainment land. mummy & i went karaoke-ing & the lil ones went to play games. 25songs for 10ringgit. the games, i didnt bother. almost fainted, due to hunger & lack of oxygen. hehs.

1.30pm-10pm, that was how fast tyme flies while youre having fun

we ended the day feeling tired & satisfied. boyfriend called me & was obviously missing me. AHHH AKU PAT SINGAPORE TK RISAO SANGAT, AKU GI MALAYSIA STAKAT SATU HARI KAU DA BISENG. heheh. TAHU PUN SAYANG. lolx. fought for the toilets & all headed to bed. as for me, i sat on the comp just to upload all the photos.

i was touched when one of my bestest of bestest of bestest friend drop by my workplace just to pass me few books &&&& also bought me chocolates. while we are suppose to meet at bugis. i swear, i was moved by your actions. i didnt expect that you would bother. well, thank you so much BABIGEMOK. im sooo happy that your wound healed. jom ngok crite hantu lagi PLEASSSEE! i wanna watch you run out off the cinema^^

night lovies, its getting llate &&& im hungry

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

10:21 PM

My Beautiful Girl

eventhough you dun have all the time for me, you bothered to text me & wanting to catch things up with me. at least i know that your words are true. how shocking it is to be styll close to you as your brother is my ex boyfriend. heh. well, dearest nurul lets head to town super soon. ^^

My sundays, are always occupied. its been awhile since i met this beautiful one. so many things happen in a blink of an eye. the ex's the playboys, now we both settled down & found the one who has been there without us noticing. For those who supported me & was my pillar of strength when i was in my weakest, i wouldnt be who i am now & would lost my way in love.

♥ITS A NEW BEGINNING♥

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

11:08 PM

TAKEN ON OUR VERY FERST DATE, ONLY THE TWO OF US

a night i didnt sleep thinking whether im actually remembered. it caught me thinking, i was alwaes the one looking for you. well, i hated this feeling cause i lost my BESTFRIEND few years back for the same reason. not knowing i wasnt needed animore as we separated to different skuls. & she went around telling ppl "i never did look for her, she's alwaes the ferst one to text me" hurtful ryte? why do you im scared & not telling you how i felt. the same thing would happen. &&& truthfully, i was disappointed with your reply thru fb. well, i waited for your msg on the past sundays. it takes two hands to clap same as in a relationship. but, our friendship is much important den aniting else thats why i didnt stop working on it. i miss you. i miss you super much. i really do.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

1:13 AM

My life wouldnt be happier, without you ♥

well, as far as i know. youre the best that i have. your patience & sacrisfies. you manage to tolerate with me without shouting, scolding or say nasty words to me. all that you said was, "your prettier when your angry" heh. you nvr fail to remind me how god made me, beautiful. people ofte says, the ferst few months is honeymoon period. frankly speaking. the way we handle stuffs i think every day is honeymoon. therefore, iloveyou, i love the way you are & the way you treated me from the start, which made me treat you the same. ticktockticktock, time passes so fast when im with you

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

12:26 AM

if i were to be your girlfriend, would you let go of me if your ex gf turns back to you?

cause i promise, if i were to be yours. i'll be the sweetest girl. i'll listen to every word you say. &&& try my best to be your best girlfriend.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

12:00 AM

❤BYE BABY, thank you for everything

i didnt noe it would be the last tyme seeing you. i didnt know someone would just steal you away from me. one year already, you have been there proctecting me. i treasure every moments with you on the bike. i didnt manage to crave my name, add roses to beautiful your life. all i did was to leave scars on you. im sorry that i abandon you. just so you know, im disappointed with myself. dear bitch, you're just a cheapsket slut. you can use it, but your journey will not be safe. OUH BEAUTIFUL NOVA, thats the last of you.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

1:59 AM

MAKANMAKANMAKAN, maner tk gemok.

everytime when i meet anyone i would say "im hungry" ouh yess, my appetite got bigger & my digestive system gets better. after every meal, i would head to the toilet. whether im fat or not, i dun freaking care. cause i believe ppl should accept me for who i am. when was the last time i had a proper date? IDK. omg, i dun miss getting to noe ppl like i used to. feeling like a slut being on every guy's bike. hah. ALHAMDULILAH, i've changed. from head to toe. & i dun like being treated like a princess. senang siket laki aku. hah. ouhhh nonoo, not attached YET. waiting for somebody to ask me officially & properly. ^^

ouhhh my poor boy gemok, who have to go through operation 2 days ago. i hope that big box of chocolate did cheer you up & my accompny for few minits made you smile. ELEH! mengatal ngn nurse2 pat sane gerek kn? ANIWAY, good taste. the nurse is super sweet! i cant deny that i missed you. its been donkey of months since we met kn? will see you again okie? i noe you'll be discharged soon. get well soon gemok. &&&& you noe, i seriously got lost once i step the west side. once i got my own, i shall travel more to the west. to meet you & not forgeting my gerl. heheh. &&& khairul solihin, i f miss going for lessons with you & hear me complain about the instructors. having lunch & breakfast with me! skrg aku loner luhhhs pat sane! my lynda, chewy & peng was forever bz with werk. && for me, every sundays will spend my tyme there where everyone is spending tyme with famili n friends. if only, i took my theory early, i dun have to wait for sooooo llong. few steps closer^^

having my leave on this monday. &&&& guess wad, im going for a date^^ weeeee.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

12:54 AM

SELAMAT RAYE MAAF ZAHIR BACEN. blablablabla

blog, tagboard & everything is dusty. strangers, friends,bloghoppers,enemies, whoever reads my blog & expect UPDATES, im sorry cause i haven have the time to stare at the comp for long hours to update. *ciom tangan* when was the last tyme i bought a baju raya which cost a bomb/ designer collection? 3yrs back? goodness, i regretted buying mine. everywhere i turn ppl wearing it. i bet you guys came across 2 for $150 ones? never would i buy such a copyrighted baju kurung. this year wasnt as CHEERFUL as last few years? maybe the fact of NOT having a bf for 3yrs for raya? does it make a diff? or the fact of letting go of someone every year? friends or even family members? i dun wan to loose anyone else next yr, PLEASE. i shall pray for a better raya next year. my "dearest" raymie *roll eyes* have been bugging me to update my blog. eh awak tkmu nak kembang k. muke dala cam kueh pao, maseh nak step cute cam teletubbies. GELI PLS RAYMIE! hahahahaha. i noe your smiling & laughing as you read this. pls, tkmu ciom kerete hyundai lagik. naseb baek maseh hidop, kalau tk tk dapat luh jumpe fatyn lagi. nyehhh. &&&& tkde org ble irritated idop fatyn lagik. MENDAK LUH PULAK! get well soon okie GEMOK BABI. when was the last time we met? donkey yrs ago?

BABYGERL&HARUN; you guys get well soon.

especially babygerl, i terribly miss you & i noe you miss me too. im so sorry that i could see you for almost 3 weeks. you should know where have i been. you didnt miss anything much okie. as you see, i dun even meet my friends even going for raya. this SUNDAY, i shall travel to jurong to meet you okie?? i wanna, pull your hair, pinch your nose, poke your eyes, squeeze your boobs than hug you tightly can?? heheh. i love you.

IF YOU THINK LIFE'S A BITCH, THINK AGAIN. noone else to be blamed if your leading a sucky life other than you. your the one whose suppose to make plans for your own life. if you tink by playing around with other people's hearts would brighten your freaking life, think again? whoever you are, whoever felt stabbed after reading this, im sorry. but, you deserve this. you deserved to be hated by all genders. you deserve this life your having right now. the person who you said you loved, left you. your lies which you have made, bought you to sorrows rather than happiness. you made her a fool infront of your friends. you told her 1001 lies. you tought her to fight. you made her a stronger person & made yourself weaker. she have move on with her life & happier off without you. dun come back to ruin her happiness. she will never be with you ever again, cause she really thinks that your a jerk.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

11:09 PM

believing you was like believing that unicorns are real, sincerely yours

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

1:47 AM

when things get rather complicated♥

lets face the fact that im easily feel insecure. as much as i try not to feel this way, i simply cant. dun blame me why i am like dis. cause, this is me. i could be a sweetheart if you show me you deserve it. im pampered. &&& its been a long tyme a guy actually pamper me. other den my daddy whose still feeding me. ^^ COMMITMENTS? i cant commit myself into relationship, as im styll feeling neglected. i easily feel this way & the worst part, i give up easily even if you say you love me. so pls, dun need to tell that you love me.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

10:03 AM

yesterday i cut my finger & it still bleeds. today i broke my toe nail.

spend my midnight with rinie on saturday night. its been donkey of months i haven seen her. we caught stepup at 11.10 at downtown as we miss the movie at 9.45. both of us were late. headed to tampiness & got myself 3pairs of lenses. just to watch 3D. regreted. as my vision was blur wen as my lenses wen crazy. the best thing was, we manage to catch up about our life.

well my boys said; "how come your number of gerls increased"

my replied; "i've stop GETTING TO KNOW BOYS, && the girls whom i met wasnt the gerls i've met in my past whose bunch of botches or could i said HYPOCRITE" babygerl, i've missed you. i shall visit you again soon together with your baju kurong*smiles* b, i do this cause i want you to have a happy raya, even though you cant travel much. deng2, ayam & wadever i cud get you from geylang i will. =)

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

10:40 PM

♥ my bestfriend since 10year old

after many years, you never did change. you're styll the same as the ferst tyme i met you, close to you. & that the reason why i love you. we were as sticky as glue in our primary skul days.

i swear i miss that. youre ms popular, as the whole skul noes you for being NENEK ROCK . i remember the situation whereby you took your hairband off & spin ur hair like nobodys business at the playground where there many of us. & thats how you got your name. & ppl noe me as KAMBING, i dunno who. we were so sticky that we have our "SISTERS" nick name. your satay black & im satay white. stupid? hilarious? lame? i noe. the boys has one thousand & one ways to irritate us to make sure they end up getting pinched. i dun care what other says about you, i noe you well enough to trust anyone who talks about you to me. OUH MY GOD, babe, eventhough we're not as close as last tyme. your styll in me. youre NEVER forgotten. theres so many memories with you. lets meet every once a week will you? i've miss you alot! movie? picnic ? library? haha! ouhhh anything for us to get together again? MISSED

theres no other person can be compared to you.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

9:54 PM

PLEASE GET A LIFE PUPPYFACE, i have my own man.

A.B, i might not be as sweet as other girls. but did i prove to you that im faithful. i know how much you dislike my guyfriends. but i've picked a few as my true friends. i dun write sweet poetry or compose songs like you did. the least i could show you is, im true. i wudnt want to go back to sq one & get-to-know other guys. i wudnt ferget how we met. how you manage to capture my eyes & make me drool. i was caught by some of your friends for eyeing on you. i dunno how you manage to make me get hooked to you. eventually i did. i tried 1001ways, i swear. wen i won, i neglected you. i took you for granted. i was so close to loose you. PLEASE, dun take revenge to hurt me. & i cant run away from the fact that i actually fell so deeply for you. imy.

babygerl, we wun be meeting for awhile. as your buzy werking for barbie. im one call away when you need me*misses*<3

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

10:04 PM

you tattooed your name in my heart.

i swear, you styll linger thru my mind.

could you explain the dream which made me teared when i woke up this morning? did you noe my heart beats super fast when i was going to work. an hour later, my heart felt as if it was stabbed when i actually saw you there. never did expect that my feelings towerds you was soooo strong. boy, its been so long that i actually loved someone. its been 3-4yrs. i manage to move on wondering alone aimlessly. till the day i met you. but i hurts even more when i get to know you.

you said; "this writings are the axe,chisel & hammer that have broken the wall. the wall which i have built, & without realising it, i lost you building it"

you moved me, you touched my heart, you made me teared, IM TOUCHED. im touched that you actually read my blog, remember my birthday. im touched that you bothered to spill everything in a piece of paper. but, it doesnt heal me. & get back my trust. im sorry. let my heart slowly heal, if we are meant to be, we will be. & listen to the songs i put in my profile, its mostly about you.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

10:14 PM

counting down to birthday. ouhhhh tyme is passing super fast.

5 days to go, i dunno why m i excited. but i thinking im excited for getting myself a new handphone. HOPEFULLY. please daddy, i think its about time. i dun need an iphone cause i dun it to distract me from werk. i jus need a mini phone=) ouhh, the hair haven been doing well, maybe its tyme to get them done this sunday. if my sunday is not occupied. maybe a facial too. ouhh toking about sunday, was hoping eyecandy will be working. nyehhhh. can get a peep of hym. PEH MIANG. have been faithful to ONE all this while, but its not werth it. DUH.

CHANGING NUMBER super soon. weeee

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

9:47 PM

ADORABLY AWESOME. I LOVE MYSELF, IM SO HAPPY

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

9:30 AM

boys, where are you? did you know that we miss all of you?

there use to be more of us, we left with 5 down down to TWO.

well, we see you guys as "brothers" & wanted things to last. one by one you guys dissappear.

& left us hanging alone. without you guys, i wudnt be close to babygerl. the fights & arguments we went thru made us closer. but the fact when you guys chose your ways of life, you actually neglected us. we tried every ways to have outing to have all of you together again. eventually, nothing works. thank you for the memories.

babygerl, we'll stay forever can?

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

9:29 AM

i haven meet my babygerl for two weeks already, i've missed you.

there's no malay girlfrend who understands me more than you do

i didnt expect myself to meet somebody who's so like me*winks* you should noe what i mean. well, it seemed that i changed & made us totally opposite. but it doesnt mean we cant get along? we have known each other for almost a yr. & its unexpected that we're styll as close as before.

you have been a great listening ear. u were dere when i blast in tears. when my day was HORRIBLE. when i lost my bestfriend, thaqiff. you were pillar of strength. i remember the time when you got into an accident with the keling baba. you dunno how worried i was & tot i could loose you! i rushed to the hospital, i cried in the cab like a kentalgerl. yesyes, im such a crybaby. though we alwaes didnt have a chance to go out only the TWO of us as we are staying so far away from each other. b, stop falling for playboys can, i noe all of them are HOT. but, its not werth it. you should noe i fell for a BIG TIME PLAYER. you should know who. I LET GO cause hys not werth it eventhough ive been dating hym for manymany months. let go of your mat. & move on. i wanna see you happy. & not go thru wadever i went thru. stop being a party animal honey, the clubs are where ppl AIM you.i care, thats why i like to sindeh2. nyehhh. meet up soon oki? iloveyouhottie.

&& "bestfriend" why cant you except me back as a bestfriend? you dunno that im worried for you. well, i styll care for you. im styll keeping track of you.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

8:41 PM

RUSTY,rusty,rusty. its been ages since i last logged in blogger & really have tyme be on the comp to read emails, chat, & update my blog. hands start to itch, went to hotmail &wanting create a new accnt, tagged AGAIN to find some ppl who ive missed & twitter.

im still up on my foot & standing strong. now that your TOTALLY gone from my life, i jus wanna bless you with a good future & pretty awesome godess girlfriend. nyehhh. remembering every single word, sentence, phrase you told me affects me deeply. the FAKE/FALSE hope you gave me, the spells & the times we spend are just meant for awhile. as expected. i shouldnt have gave you a chance & tyme. i shud have jus left while your still nothing to me. i thought you would change. your actions speak louder den words. im not a gf material & esp for guys like you. furthermore, i CANT & nvr trust you. im sorry.i felt terrible for being so harsh towerds you, IM SORRY but maybe you deserve all this. you neglected me. your such a GOOD LIAR. im done. thank you.

im not a lost child. im still on the correct path. thanks to the ppl i've been with. with alot of doubts & regrets to move on, i believe my past thought me alot of stuffs. im glad that i've been thru all kinds of situation in the past & i could manage myself right now. MOST say i've changed, i did. im sorry, but im happier the way i am right now. my babygerl loves me more this way. FATYN SOMBONG? fatyn friendly nuh org tk suke=__=' lantak. i choose my way, i wun let anyone control my life. except for my parents. && i admit i was a stubborn gerl. &&& im trying my very best to listen for their advises. well. im aint telling the werld dat im trying to be PERFECT. but there's nothing wrong to aim for perfection. ryte?

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

11:51 PM

i want your love♥

i'll do anything for you just to make you happy. although i shallnt make you my first priority, i want you part of my life. age doesn't play apart. for month 7months we've been thru alot already. the first few months was a struggle for me. alot of changes need to be done. you've played a HUGE part in my life. you manage to change to the person i am now. my past haunts you, your past haunts me too. we often argue over the smallest thing. as much as we hate each other, we manage to sort things out. you though me defense, & that is when i realized you cared for me. i NEVER expect that we will styll be like this. iloveyou

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

9:47 PM

YOU TREAT ME LIKE A ROSE

every girl always wanted to be treated like a princess, a rose, a crystal. but boys nowadays, wants more attention den gerls do. but im sorry, i cant fulfil that. im used to being alone & tend to be more independent. FORGET abt being mushy2. cause im not moved by that. sweet werds?? i was a fool for BELIEVING every word ppl say. NOW i chose to NOT believe anyone. except for one person. dun ask me why & dun need to noe who. well, the mothers have been trying to match make me with some boys. ouh dear, my lil brother's frens' mom hav been asking me whether im attached or not. & my mothers fren have been kinda brave enough to let my mom noe that he wanna get to noe me. how crazy can it get. well boy, how much you could impress my mom. doesnt mean you could impress me.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

12:12 PM

because your someone that i NEVER wanna loose. I♥YOU, i swear.

you dunno how blessed m i to know you. i remember YOU were the one who comfort me when i cried beginning of skul, in 2008. never did i expect US to be so close till now. dear gerl, you were the main reason why i quited smoking. you BELIEVE in me. you MOTIVATED me. you showed me that you really care fer me. you showed that you loved me. i dun remember when was the last tyme i smoked. i wasted hundreds of dollars fer those ciggs. when somebody offered me or tempt me to smoke you were on my mind. i told them "i promised someone who means alot to me. && she's my bestfriend. i dun wan to disappoint her & myself. not fergeting my mother who was extremly shocked & proud of me" i WILL NVR let you down. not only for that. for trusting me in everything. believing in me. theres NOONE like you

Charissa, your as beautiful as your heart is

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

11:32 PM

how would you feel when you tried so hard to be a better person some ppl styll talks about the past & eventually haunts & affects the present & future?

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

2:26 PM

theres no other boy which could replace this boy.

i remember the times when my mom just gave birth to him. i was the one who pet him to sleep, bought him to hys bed & watch him sleep. play around with him. though him how to walk.stand by him during when the sunsets cause he will start crying. i remember bringing him everywhere i go. rush back home from school to takecare of hym. now hys all grown up, maybe forget that i was the one. who showered him with love. yet, i styll pampered him & love him.

NO matter what happens; i wouldnt let the past affects my present & future. i believe i could pave for a better life. i believe in myself. && i'll nvr will give up. the weird dreams i had, made me even more confident. cause whatever i dream is slowly becoming reality.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

12:36 PM

The belt was abit out though.

its been awhile since i last blog. i've deleted my tagged &&& even planned to delete my fb. dun ask me why. i jus feel like disappearing from dix cyber werld to start a new life. my past affected my future. NOT only that, i wanna change my number too. well, i hardly had tyme to go out especially with my gerls. i think i decide not to have any contcts with any guys too. kinda LAME. but not all friends are FRIENDS! so i decide who i chose to contct.

BASICALLY, the ppl are; ZAWANAH,NICO,SARA,BAKY,SUE,FIZAH.

these ppl has seen me grown & accepted my PAST,PRESENT,FUTURE

i miss ALL of you, && promise i will make myself free fer you guys.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

11:43 PM

its been awhile since i last spend tyme with them, things wasnt like befer=)

we decide to head to eastcoast park on the 2nd day of new yr. the place was crowded with indians & malays. we push ourselves out at 11 am. the sun was ryte above us, i almost died. im so not use to the sun since i step in beauty therapy.

basically, my sister didnt join us. my dad, nvr like such places. MAN*roll eyes*

the aunties came together with the kids. i was the eldest there. obviousli, i didnt get myself in sea water. i sat with my aunties. getting to no about the family was rather interesting. the heat which gain from my black top made me perspire like a mad dog, which made me kinda pisst offf.

decided to go to the ladies to get change &&& i realized that my small cuzzie is super adorable.

i got bored, & decided to go cycling. i dragged myself alone to the shop && i ended up with blades. one hour i rented fer 10bucks. the blades aint as disgusting as the previous shops that i went befer. &&& the best thing was, i wasnt alone. i bumb into hakim at the inline culture place where i rent my blades &&& where im gonna buy my blades=) huhu.

its been donkey of yrs eversince i touched my blades & meet hym. god!! i noe your amazed hakim! aft a long tyme suddenly i changed. && look i look weird with the blades. & ppl was staring at me when i was blading=___='

it was pretty amazing that i could bumb into the ppl who has been there fer me. its no only hakim, i bumb into fizah, my primary skul bestie. its so weird to see her at eastcoast! after blading, i called azard up to order pizza as i wanted hym to sen. we argue fer awhile as he wasreluctant to sen the order as i only order a set. planned to order TWO sets. but my aunties cook as if its a buffet.

SHE didnt change, i remembered on that day, i shout her name & she look at me & said "sape sak" *roll eyes* after so long we haven had tyme to meet up, finally we manage to catch some stuffs.

&& how adorable can she get?? i told her to sit beside me &&& she sat the same position i sat.

i had fun with the kids. who wudnt. they're jus so adorable.

one of them said "kak fatyn dari tadi amek gambar. tk penat ker??"

adoiiiii! kids are pretty observant. how scary can that get???

i dunno how long i stayed @ eastcoast, but the most important was i had fun with my family & friends.

its 10am now, &&& im suppose to get ready fer werk.

CNY=VALENTINES DAY?? dun mention about valentines. i was too tired aft werking like a mad dog. eventually i slept the whole day at home. msgs i received were not entertained. opppps. i hate forward msgs. its NONSENSE.

i realized, i was blinded by someone who was so charming. because of hys charm, i ignore the person who was alwaes there fer me.

STRAWBERRY IS MINE ♥

9:56 AM